Sunday, January 5, 2014

Daily Post #5: Seny

Despite all that has changed in my life, I would never want to be 20 again. Sure, I was thinner, with loads of energy and free time.  Now at 48, I have more responsibilities, more wrinkles (crows feet as my husband reminds me) and more drooping body parts than I could imagine.  But I also have three things I didn't have back then: self-awareness, confidence and a really awesome kid.

At one time, I imagined, 'wouldn't it be cool to be in my 20's and know what I know now then?'  Then, I watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button in 2008 and that thought quickly disappeared.

This movie changed my thinking,   “Life can only be understood looking backward. It must be lived forward.” ― Eric Roth and there were several additional quotes that moved me.  Here are some of those quotes with my thoughts or experiences that follow.

“I hope you live a life you’re proud of. If you find that you’re not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again.”― Eric Roth, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button screenplay
The key is are you living that life you are proud of or are you living from someone else's expectations and dreams.  My 40's redefined me, especially my experiences during this decade of my life, helped me gain strength to 'start all over again.'  It's been life-fulfilling and invigorating to get up every morning and experiencing a new day with new experiences.  We create our day, choose who we want to be with, the friends we stay close to and family, with those experiences, who will always be in our hearts.  I am stronger now, ready to take on the day with a new vigor.

“For what it’s worth: it’s never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There’s no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. ” ― Eric Roth, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button screenplay

It is a choice, you have a choice whether to remain the same or change.  There are no rules, and you can't expect to live by rules that others place in your vocabulary or in 'who you are being'.  You can be free of this, and stop what you were doing before and being someone different.

“Our lives are defined by opportunities, even the ones we miss.” ― Eric Roth

Mainly by keeping our minds open to the possibilities.  I have learned and am still learning, to listen, really listen to what people are saying.  Instead of interrupting, putting words into sentences or continuing a thought when someone is sharing their experience or story.  Every story is different.  Even if you come from a family, family doesn't create your story.  Only you can experience the story you live.   Appreciate and respect this in others.  Just because you have an opinion doesn't mean it fits in the other person's life experiences.  Appreciate their story, listen, really listen to them and maybe you will gain some new insight or be enlightened by the conversation.

“It’s a funny thing coming home. Nothing changes. Everything looks the same, feels the same, even smells the same. You realize what’s changed, is you.” ― Eric Roth

I love taking a stroll back to my childhood home.  It's lovely to reminisce with my loved ones, to share my stories with them.  Showing them the ballpark where I played my first softball game, or my schools I attended.  Even sharing my childhood home.  There are wonderful stories.  The place doesn't change too much.  Many people stay there because they like the 'same-ness' about it.  I appreciate and respect this.  I am happy to realize that I have changed, and have grown into a successful and award winning author.  I think these experiences are the base of my stories.  And I have grown from there.  I love to go back to feel the sameness, the feelings, the smells, the dialogue, it doesn't change much and that's what's nice about having that experience, to visit it all over again.

“I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you`re proud of, and if you find that you`re not, I hope you find the strength to start all over again.” ― Eric Roth

More and more, as I continue to meet more people, locally and from around the world, I gain a large respect for people who are different than me.  I learn much about their different point of view.  It took me a while, but I am very proud of who I am.  I have learned to not expect anyone to tell me they are proud of me.  Those words don't come easy.  I forgive myself a lot because I am harder on myself than anyone.  And I do tell myself how proud I am to be who I am.  I'm different! I'm strong, I'm resilient, I'm smart and I am happy!  I have found the strength many times to start all over again, again and again.  And I hope you can too.  It's a lifelong process, to Reach, Stretch and Grow!

Catalan language -  Seny. A combination of well-pondered perception of situations, level-headedness, awareness, integrity and right action.

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